i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
