butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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