so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I want you more than these girls want KFC
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I am one with the molecules
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
