This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
The dick lei will go down in squad history
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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