I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
