At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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