so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
