i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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