Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
