come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
