what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Randomize
