this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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