Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
