Just mADE A PArabola og urine
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
