he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Randomize
