Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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