Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
