The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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