She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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