i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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