It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
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