oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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