I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
