Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
