I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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