You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
