..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Sext me about skeletons
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
