just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
