MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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