Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Randomize
