Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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