People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
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