Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
