I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
