have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
