we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I would fuck him just for his dog
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
