Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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