What a fucking waste of an outfit
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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