Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
