My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
