He disabled his match.com account in front of me
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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