My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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