well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
