you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
