When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
