i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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