If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
