it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Randomize
