similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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