But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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